Hello! My names Eilidh and I’m the blogger behind Maisy Meow. As a first time mum to 3 month old Oliver, I’m still learning the ropes with this whole motherhood thing and I’m sharing my experiences along the way. Baby chat aside, I love interiors and anything Pinterest related. My blog is a bit of everything going on in my head, alongside some pretty pictures, so make yourself a cuppa and drop by for a visit.
Before I start this post, I want to be the first to point out the irony. Yes, this post in itself is parenting advice but let’s assume that if you’ve clicked on this, you’re open to it. Now, with that out the way…
One of the many surprises when becoming a parent is how many people want to tell you how to do it. Whether you’re doing something ‘wrong’, doing too much of this or not enough of that, everyone wants to share their pearls of parenting wisdom when they see a new baby. If you’ve asked for the advice or it’s coming from a close friend or relative, great. I often ask for baby advice on my blog or on my instagram and I love reading through all the tips from everyone. But when it’s a stranger in the supermarket, you’re stressed out and sleep deprived, advice on your parenting can come across as criticism or to put it bluntly, a slap in the face.
Every baby is different. The breakthrough trick that worked with someone else’s baby might be one in a list of failed attempts you’ve had with yours. Or you might have already heard that cliche baby ‘tip’ from the lady on the bus this morning (and the man at the checkout this afternoon). If you’re like me, you probably have a pre-made rant that you could recite every time this situation occurs but let’s face it, do you really want to spend your days lecturing every self-declared parenting expert you come across?
Unwanted baby advice is something that’s going to come your way whether your like it or not, unfortunately, and the best thing you can do for yourself is to learn how to handle it.
First things first, remember that behind every piece of advice is a good intention. You might have to wade through some judgement and ignorance to find it sometimes, but everyone who gives you baby advice is ultimately trying to help in their own way.
It’s also important to set the boundaries for advice as early as you can. The worst thing you can do is get yourself into a situation where you bite your tongue the first few times then suddenly snap and lose your temper after hours of unwanted baby advice. If you don’t want to hear it, give them a simple smile, ‘thanks’ and move on with your day. You don’t have to justify yourself, or tell them why their advice isn’t useful to you. Don’t allow the conversation to begin. Silence is powerful and will make it pretty clear that you’re not interested.
You can unintentionally invite advice from people if you’re talking about an issue you’re facing with your baby. You might just be looking for someone to listen, but the natural response is for the other person to try and help in some way. Learn to expect advice in this situation and be careful who you vent to.
And lastly, the simple advice that’s definitely easier said than done – rise above it. You’re the parent and you know your baby better than anyone. You know what advice to take on board, what to discard and you will ultimately make a decision based on what’s best for you and your baby. Handling unwanted parenting advice is just another challenge that comes with the parenthood package and at the end of the day, it can only make your skin thicker.
I hope that you enjoyed this guest post and if you did please do go visit Eilidh on her channels :